Some Things I Love:
1. Whistling in a room that echoes.
2. My new favorite comedian from listening to XM radio is Mitch Hedberg. When I told my husband, and said "We have GOT to go see this guy live!" he said "I think he just died?" "Shut up! ...Well, that would make it much harder, wouldn't it?" Okay, so that is not so happy. Turns out, he just passed away in March. But the guy's style (ironic one-liners, etc.) makes me laugh almost harder than anything else I've ever heard. Or read for that matter. Check it out.
3. The mother-in-law as a constant source of humor. Remember how I referenced in the last post about her bitching out the cops? Here's the story: M.I.L. and husband are selling their house. Buyer was extremely interested. Buyer was older woman with still-older mother to take care of. Buyer went to police and fire departments to ask about safety and crime. Both told her they wouldn't buy a house in that area. M.I.L. went to both departments "cleverly" pretending to be a potential buyer. Asked questions about crime and safety. When they told her, she "dramatically" revealed her identity. "That's MY house you're talking about. And you made us lose a sale! You shouldn't give your opinions about that kind of thing. Blah Blah BLAH." Thing is, the M.I.L. and husband have made SEVERAL calls themselves (that we know of, I'm sure there have been more) about "loud noise" from the neighbors and she has called a few times when she has been alone because she "heard a noise" in the house. So I'm pretty sure they've helped up their own incident rate. But here's the best part: after she went to the stations, she said they got a few hangup phonecalls that night. So she called my husband to tell him the story "...just in case something happens to Andy and I", because she thinks the cops are now on her ass.
4. Lee has shared with me his office's obsession with David Hasselhoff (aka The Hoff), as well as what it means to get "Hoffed" (it is, of course, all mocking in nature - Hoff Puns Gone Wild so to speak). With that knowledge, he has also shared some of the photos they've passed around. To wit:
...and, of course, because he hadn't killed me enough...
(you have to click it for full effect)
...and then - THEN - he hit me with this (aptly named, Sarcomhoff):
See more VERY funny Hoff mocking HERE.
Some Things I Hate:
1. People who request Read Receipts on the emails they send me at work. Now I'm under all this pressure to answer just because you have to know EXACTLY when I open your precious little email so you can keep track of EXACTLY how long I blow you off. Ass.
2. The beginning of football season.
3. That Jennifer Lopez is all over the media all of the sudden saying she thinks "J.Lo" feels juvenile to her and she wishes people would stop calling her by the name. Honey, you should have figured that one out a LOT earlier...like when the first person came to you and said "You know what would REALLY make you a household name and get people to take you seriously as an artist? We need to get them to call you a fun name that sticks in their heads AND sounds like a stripper alias - how about J.Lo?!?" and you said "Perfect! Don't you think so, Puffy?"
4. Football highlights at 11:00 pm.
Some Things I am Confused About:
1. Why does it feel so gross if you spit when brushing your teeth and miss and hit the toothbrush? I mean, think about it...
2. Will Rory and Lorelai start talking again on Tuesday? Or will they draw out this standoff with Rory in grandma and grandpa's poolhouse not congratulating Lorelai on her engagement to Luke? Tell me. TELL ME!
3. Period. 4 days early. Goddamit.
4. People who can eat beets.
