Sarcomical: Half-Week Haiku 41: Now Would Be a Good Time for Vanity to Kick In...

March 08, 2006

Half-Week Haiku 41: Now Would Be a Good Time for Vanity to Kick In...

I can't believe I'm showing you this. But I love you. I love you with the infinite size of Internet Love which circles the galaxy and comes back around to envelop you in a Big Sloppy Internet Smack on the Cheek. *swoon* But I digress. What was this supposed to be about? OH YES, this week's Haiku assignment. See, two years ago we went to Florida with my sister and The Husband's brother. The sister and I acted like two Mad-Crazy Hotties and went to Disneyworld. That's right, we rocked the House of Mouse like a couple of Paris and Nicole Bitches. Okay, I kid.

Aaannnyway...what is a kickass trip to Disney without a ride on Splash Mountain? And WHAT, may I ask, is a ride on Splash Mountain without the 2-hour wait in an 89-degree line with sweaty screaming children and horny teenagers who think of the wait as a perfect time for public foreplay? Well, we finally made our glorious way onto the "raft". The creepy music and moving psycho animals began. *shudder* And slowly, ever so slowly, we made our way to THE FINAL DROP. Oh, wait a minute? Did you not get a good enough look at us in that last pic? Do not think I don't love you enough to give you a closer look at our sweet little faces, because YOU KNOW I DO. Even at the risk of you losing all further respect for me.

I give you...GROTESQUE FACIAL CONTORTIONS ON SPLASH MOUNTAIN:

That's us. With the sunglasses on. Can you tell we're related by our Tandem Screams? Lovely, no?

And so, your assignment for this week's Haiku is to caption this photo with your wit, talent, imagination, and if applicable, biting sarcasm. I have no doubt these should be interesting. As always, I'll get things started:

zip-a-dee-do-dah
so we're not up high, right sis?
fuck you, brer rabbit

Now YOU.

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This is me.

I'm an animal snuggler, Lover of Words and raging introvert who others often confuse for an extrovert. I'm typically caffeinated as a rule, BE IT BY BEAN OR BY LEAF.

This is the year I'll be talking a lot about my journey to grow further as a photographer, artist, music addict, YOGISTA, writer, volunteer, life adventurer, ALMOST-VEGETARIAN, runner, book devourer, knee sock connoisseur and procreator (yes, after 13 years we're finally working on that one, and it may be a more twisty path than we anticipated).

I embrace my inner geek (see: obsession with finding the perfect pen, affection for NERD GLASSES) and accept my irrational fears (see: FEET, rug bugs, outer space). I figure they balance out my super cool musical tastes, good luck in parking lots and long legs.

*Wife to 1, fur mother to 4.
Future parent to severely over-photographed children.

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