Half-Week Haiku 43: Kill It Dead

Would you believe this is not the worst fashion choice I ever made? Well, give me credit...it WAS a Christmas gift. Nothing says sexay like a pair of black acid-wash jeans, baby. And you can't see it but I'm sure they were straight leg with tight-ish ankles. And I bet I wore them to school with a fuscia or teal blue shirt at some point. Oh, and white socks. GOOD GOD. But you know, I'm not quite so sure that you fully absorbed the rest of the picture yet. You might have missed something...
Oh sweet sweet lord. The bangs. You DO realize this was Christmas morning, right? And that I had just gotten up? So that wreckage was the REMAINS of the day before, the indestructable wall of bangs. Oh beautiful. Hot Cheese on a Cracker, that was some fine, fine hair.
So, what's the point of all this? It's been pointed out to me that it's been quite a while since our last Half-Week Haiku, and I promised the goods. So here it is. This week, haiku all about the fashion statement (or two) that you hope has gone to the land where bad style goes to die a horrible painful death and never ever returns. As usual, I'll go first to get you started:
those high-waisted jeans screaming "my hips! look at them!" not what i aim for
OR... boys think it's funny a strategically-placed hand hypercolor sucks (Do you remember that?!?)