Sarcomical

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #18: How You Live Edition

*If you're new here, this is how to play:

• After reading my answers, copy and paste the list into your comment.
• Change my one-word responses with yours (that's right - ONE word only).
• Submit your comment.

1. What wakes you:  Shakes
2. Your initial look in the mirror reveals:  Poofy
3. You usually first put on:  Jeans
4. Your closet:  Nightmare
5. Your mood before 11am:   Uninviting
6. The first thing you look at online after email:  Twitter
7. Something you tend to snack on:  Cheese
8. What you see out your front door:  Neighborpalooza
9. Your takeout menus:  Folder
10. Number of boxes of tissue out in your home right now:  Three
11. The way you sneeze would read:  "uuuuhh...CHUUSCH"
12. Number of times a day you probably brush your hair:  Two
13. The most predominant thing in your pantry:  Soup
14. A smell commonly coming from your kitchen:  Onions
15. How you sort your books:  Genre
16. The way you keep your place in a book:  Hairpin 
17. Something you hide when people come over:  Laundry
18. Number of people normally at your table during dinner:  Two
19. Something you put on your nightstand before bed:  Phone
20. How high you pull the covers when you go to sleep:  Chin

technorati tags: NaBloPoMo

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #17: More About Us Than We Ever Wanted to Know

On this week's One-Word Sarcomical Sunday, I'm digging deeper. Deeper into some of the more mundane/self-conscious/unattractive things that you weren't quite sure you'd ever really decide to share with The Internet. Why? Because those are the things all of us really want to know about each other anyway, yes? It makes us feel proportionally less mundane/self-conscious/unattractive in a larger company of the same. Isn't online community grand?

*Okay, here are the Newbie Ground Rules:

1. After reading my answers, copy and paste the list into your comment.
   
2. Change my one-word responses with yours (yes, only ONE WORD, even if it makes you want to pull your brains through your tear duct - and I design the statements to make it possible if you're clever enough, which of COURSE you are).
   
3. Submit your comment.
   
4. And hey, you can always post your finished list on your blog, too. (Yes, a post idea! You're welcome.) Link back here if you're feeling nice. Enjoy!

If you get something out of a vending machine, it's most likely the: Lays
A word you sometimes catch yourself misspelling: Unparalleled
You least want people to see you as: Irrelevant
You're a little scared of: Geese
The least attractive thing you do in your sleep: Scowl
The number of contacts in your cell phone: 94
How many of them are restaurants: 18
You lose your cool when someone: Lies
When you go to the drugstore, you often can't leave without buying: Balm
Your dance moves can best be described as: Safe
The majority of your underwear is: Unused
Something you eat even though you hate how bad it is for you: Franks
You think you're really not a great: Speaker
How much cash is in your wallet right now: $26
The majority of your shoes are this color: Black
You don't think you'll ever be able to get rid of your: Stubbornness
If your breath is bad, it's most likely because you had the: Onions
You feel embarrassed when you: Blather
The last public place where you used the restroom: Palomino
Something you don't like to debate in mixed company: Sexuality
You don't think you can pull off wearing: Fedoras
Something you own entirely too much of: Jeans
Someone you would love to see in concert who might bring down your street cred: Fergie
The last thing that you spilled on yourself: Mustard
If you were on a reality show, the producers would likely portray/characterize you as the: Wisecracker

technorati tags: One-Word Sarcomical Sundays

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #16: Good for Your Brains

You know this is a brain-soother for you...kind of like crossword puzzles or sudoku, or lining up the magazines in perfect squares on the coffee table. Oh...maybe that's just me obsessed with things being in precise piles. Ah, well! (To clarify: there can be loads and loads of stuff out, but it must all be in nice, square stacks or my brain gets all discombobulated.) So even though this is going up late on Sunday, you know you'll welcome the accomplishment you'll feel even if you're filling it out on Monday, or Wednesday, or next July.

*Here are the ground rules for the newbies:

1. After reading my answers, copy and paste the list into your comment.
   
2. Change my one-word responses with yours (yes, only ONE WORD, even if it hurts the most painful of hurts).
   
3. Submit your comment.
   
4. And hey, you can always post your finished list on your blog, too. (Yes, a post idea! You're welcome.) Enjoy.

You're Feeling: Sleepy
To Your Left: Papasan
On Your Mind: Completing
Last Meal Included: Scallops
You Sometimes Find it Hard To: Prioritize
The Weather: ENOUGH!
Something You Have a Collection of: Sputniks
A Smell that Cheers You Up: Mowing
A Smell that Can Ruin Your Mood: Windex
How Long Since You Last Shaved: Days
The Current State of Your Hair: Pinned
The Largest Item On Your Desk/Workspace Right Now (besides computer): Press
Your Skill with Chopsticks: Passable
Which Section You Head to First In the Bookstore: Periodicals
...and After That?: Photography
Something You're Craving: Community
Your General Thoughts On the Presidential Race: Hmmm...
How Many Times You've Been Hospitalized this Year: Zero
A Favorite Place to Go for Quiet Time: Bathtub
You've Always Secretly Thought You'd Be a Good: Vocalist
Something that Freaks You Out a Little: Worms
Something You've Eaten Too Much of Lately: Nuts
You Have Never: Camped
You Never Want To: Skydive

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #15: I'mb Stupffy...Take Pity Ond By Dnose

If you were able to decipher that title and read it in YOUR head the way it sounds in MY stuffy head, then I congratulate you heartily. Now, please excuse me while I blow my nose and then rub some evil instant sanitizer lotion on my hands that will one day create a Monster Virus immune to mankind's medicinal capabilities. (I'm sorry, my hands are getting all crack-y from the constant OCD-like washing.)

Here are the ground rules for the newbies:

1. After reading my answers, copy and paste the list into your comment.
   
2. Change my one-word responses with yours (ONE WORD, even if it kills you).
   
3. Submit your comment.
   
4. Feel free to post your finished list on your blog, too. (Look at that, a post idea, FREE. You're welcome.)
   
5. p.s. - Want to submit a button idea for the One-Word Sarcomical Sundays? Email the graphic to me at sarcomical at gmail dot com.

Your last meal: Kimchi
Something on your desk/work area: Tissue
Your New Year's Eve plans: Dining
The smallest gift you received this year: Earrings
The largest gift you received this year: Comforter
Something you wish you hadn't eaten so much of during the holidays: Cheeeeeese.
On your feet: Stripes
Your hair: Ponytailed
How many other countries you've traveled to: One
One country you dream of visiting: India
A hobby you'd like to take up/revisit this year: Painting
A hobby of yours that died (aww, buh-bye) this past year: Knitting
A publication you subscribe to (print): Blueprint
The most embarrassing subscription in your feed reader (if you have one): TMZ
One of your favorite stores to window shop dreamily in: Anthropologie
One of your favorite online stores to window shop dreamily on: Sephora
A color you love to wear: Green
Your bed pillow: Squishy
The color of your kitchen counter: Tan-ish
What you plan to do when you get up from the computer: Bubbles

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #14

You love these, and that's okay. Don't fight it. It's bigger than You and Me.

Here are the ground rules for the newbies:

1. After reading my answers, copy and paste the list into your comment.
   
2. Change my one-word responses with yours (can I over-emphasize that you may only use ONE WORD to answer no matter how much it makes you want to cry?)
   
3. Submit your comment.
   
4. You can always feel free to post your finished list on your blog, too. (Look at that, a post idea, FREE. You're welcome.) A link back here would be nice, of course, but the most important thing is that you enjoy yourself. So go on. Knock yourself out. I'll just be here with a puppy on my lap, with my sweatshirt covering him so it looks like I have a really disgusting irregular growth protruding from my lower stomach.

Hearing: Tock
On Your Desk/Workspace: Balm
Outside: Brrr
Your Eyes: Bespectacled
You Wish Some People Would: Soften
Before This You Were: Eating
On Your Feet: Layers
What Makes You Feel Shitty: Backstabbers
What Soothes You: Yoga
Color of Your Refrigerator: White
Number of People You Share a Bathroom With: Zero
Your First Boyfriend/Girlfriend: Freckled
Your Favorite Kind of Bread: Sourdough
On Your Mind: Husband
Something You Have to Complete: Walls
Your Last Medical Appointment: Eyes
You Want To Be: Recycling
You Wish You Knew More About: Design
The Superpower You'd Choose: Telepathy
Your Last Purchase: Presents
You Don't Like to Watch: Surgeries
Your Idea of Relaxing: Television
Last Thing You Forgot: Wallet
After This: Bed

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #13: Fall Fever

Cara suggested a Fall-themed One-Word Sarcomical Sunday to go along with the new digs, and hey, I listen to The People. I'm benevolent and awesome that way.

So, here it is - now, I suppose I have to go over the rules again with some of you who are new, is that how it is? Okay, it's simple: after reading my answers, copy and paste the list into your comment, change my one-word responses with yours (can I over-emphasize that you may only use ONE WORD to get your point across, no matter how hard it is?), then submit your comment. You can always feel free to post your answers on your blog, too. A link back here would be nice, of course, if you do so. Thanks. You smell so good today.

The Air: unseasonable
Favorite Fall Indulgence: sweaters
Out Your Window: branches
On Your Desk: olives
On Your Feet: canvas
Favorite Fall Smell: bonfire
Temperature On Your Thermostat: 75
Your Shirt: tank
Your Hair: ponytail
Something You Want to Make Sure You Do this Fall: trail
Where You Last Took a Fall (heh): stairs
Your Last Drink: water
Your Last Meal: potatoes
You're Thinking About: creating
Hearing: mower
Your Favorite Fall Color: yellow
Your Take On Seasonal Novelty Flags (i.e. turkeys, pumpkins, scarecrows): EW
A New Fall Show You Like: Shots
Your Plans for the Evening: bubbles
Your Relationship With Pumpkins: deLISHHHious

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #12

Here we go again!
For those who are new here, here are the rules:
After you read my responses, copy and paste the entire list into your comment and replace my answers with yours. You can only use ONE word to answer each item, and I know sometimes you find that painful, but we will all get through it together. Don't break the only rule, or I may be forced to ridicule you and point & laugh.

Hoping For: Clarity
Just Finished: Editing
Jonesing For: Latte
Most Annoying Brady Bunch Kid: Cindy
Word to Describe Your Personal Sense of Style: Rediscovering
Last Snack: Lays
Have Never, Ever Tried: Breakdancing
Last Clumsy Injury: Knee
Your Environment: Tidied
Daily Object You'd Like to Throw Into Oncoming Traffic: Alarm
Favorite Kind of Soup: Pea
Holiday You Don't Typically Celebrate: Halloween
Happy To Have: Sweetheart
Want To Start: Knitting
Need To Start: Running
Last Thing You Purchased: Sweater
Color of Your Car Interior: Grey
Color of the Wall in the Room You're In: Blah
Days Since Your Last Night Out: Two
Number of Rings On Your Fingers: Four
How Many Minutes It Takes To Do Your Hair: Seven
Favorite Outdoor Smell: Bonfire
Number of Clocks in Your Home (not on appliances): Five
Where You Put Spare Change: Jug

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #11

Did you miss this as much as I think you did?

It's okay to cry a little.

For those who are new here, here are the rules:
After you read my responses, copy and paste the entire list into your comment and replace my answers with yours. You can only use ONE word to answer each item, no matter how much you want to tell us more. We'll figure it out, especially if you choose perfect words. How's that for pressure?

Your Body Feels: Stiff
Your Mind Feels: Alert
The Last Thing You Ate: Peach
Something On Your Desk/Workspace: Books
On Your Chest: Threadless™
On Your Legs: Sweats
On Your Feet: Nothing
Favorite Instrument to Hear: Cello
Your Last Kiss Happened Here: Hallway
Something You Wish You'd Invented: YouTube
Something You Wish Had Never Been Invented: Credit
Favorite Place For a Quiet Afternoon: Museum
Right Now You Should Be: Emailing
You Hate When People: Lie
You Love When People: Laugh
When In Doubt, Order the: Salad
Band You're Currently Into: Fratellis
How Many Movies You've Gone to See So Far This Month: 2
Your Favorite Big Brother 8 Houseguest (oh shut up, it's my poll - just put N/A if you must): Jessica
Your Least Favorite Big Brother 8 Houseguest: Amber
Your Maternal Grandmother's Name: Alice
Your First Childhood Pet's Name: Brute
The Number of People in Your Family With Red Hair: Zero
What You're Thinking about Doing After This: Editing
What You Really WISH You Were Doing After This: Lounging

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #10

Ever have the feeling we've done this before?

Oh. That's right.

Yes, you are smart and you know how this goes by now. Also, your hair smells nice.

But for those who are new or are simply not as intelligent and amazing as you are, here's what you do. After you read my responses, copy and paste the entire list into your comment and replace my answers with yours. You can only use ONE word to answer each item, no matter how much it hurts your head. It will be okay. Take some Advil.

Feeling: Relaxed
Hoping To: Stretch
Mental State: Optimistic
Current Snack of Choice: Feta
Last Purchase: Plant
Your Mom: Sweet
A Wish: Inspiration
Your Most Ticklish Spot: Hip
Your Most Tense Spot: Shoulders
Your Desk: Stacks
You Sometimes Pretend To: Listen
A Favorite Fruit: Orange
A Favorite Vegetable: Onion
People Sometimes Think You Are: Naive
...But You Are Really: Analyzing
Your College Mascot: Trojan
Location of Your Largest Scar: Head
Your Stomach: Shrinking
A Favorite Comfort Item: Blanket
Where You'd Like to Vacation Next: West

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #9: High School Edition, Yo

It's back!

The name of the game this time is HIGH SCHOOL, FOOL. Oh yeah, I'm gonna make you rememember all of those great things about that most hormonal and akward time of your life right at the beginning of the week, no less. After you read mine, copy and paste the list into your comment and replace my answers with yours...AS YOU WOULD HAVE ANSWERED THEM AS A HIGH SCHOOL JUNIOR. You only get ONE WORD to respond. Have courage, may the force be with you, you are the wind beneath my wings, and all that crap.

Your Shoes: Canvas
Your Hair: Sprayed
Your Worst Fear: Embarrassment
The Gym: Rallies
Your Greatest Talent: Music
Your Parents: Rigid
Your Favorite Food: Pizza
Your Greatest Fault: Akwardness
Your Friends: Funny
The Opposite Sex: Hot
What You Want to Be In 10 Years: Famous
Your Means of Transportation: Friends
The Name of Your Current Crush: Kraig
Your Grades: Excellent
Something You Wish You Could Do: Dance
Your Favorite Fast Food Chain: Rax
Something Your Parents Won't Let You Do: NYU
How Many Boyfriends or Girlfriends You've Had: Three
Someone Who Has Had a Crush On You: Brian
Your Favorite Subject: English
Where You Have Made Out Most Often: Car
A Prized Possession: Stereo
Something Your Parents Won't Let You Have: Job
A Favorite Movie Star of the Opposite Sex: Dillon
Your Wardrobe: Lacking
What You're Looking Forward To: Freedom

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #8

It's back!

Remember, after you read mine, copy and paste these into your comment and replace my answers with yours. You only get ONE WORD to respond. You can do it, don't be scared now.

Your Shirt: Orange
To Your Right: Windows
To Your Left: Bookcase
The Most Recently-Placed Object On Your Desk: Starbuck's
You Detest: Papayas
Have Been Thinking About: Career
Would Like To Buy: Sandals
Will Never Buy: Porn
Your Upcoming Week's Biggest Negative: Job
Your Upcoming Week's Greatest Plus: Weather
Part Of Your Last Meal: Beans
Something You Won't Tolerate: Lying
Something You Can't Turn Down: Pie
Your Mind: Busy
Your Preferred Flavor of Toothpaste: Peppermint
The Location of Your First Kiss: Garage
Your Favorite Part of a Picnic: Wine
A Favorite Type of Tree: Willow
The Last Thing You Completed: Flyer
You'd Love To Be Invisible For One Day In a Room With: Dubya

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #7

Another Sunday, another list. You love it, I love it. Let's all go for ice cream.

Remember, after you read mine, copy and paste these into your comment and replace my answers with yours. You only get ONE WORD to express your brilliance in answering. Choose wisely, you pretty little thing, you.

Your Weekend: Playful
Smelling: Springtime
Annoyed By: Bra
Your Face: Sleepy
Your Pants: Swooshy
Something You Want To Create: Beauty
A Favorite Old Movie Star: Kelly
Not Looking Forward To: Running
Hearing: Chimes
You Wish You Could: Strum
Last Thing You Cooked: Tilapia
Your Breakfast: Shake
Your Driving Record: Clean
Last Illness: Throat
Want To Be: Exploring
Mind Keeps Wandering To: Plans
You Despise: Obstinance
Unprepared For: Retirement
Favorite Part Of Spring: Blooming
Your Toenails: Peach
Proud Of Your: Hopefulness
Not Proud Of Your: Hesitation
How You Decompress: Solitude
Your Kitchen Table: Round
Something You Want to Accomplish Today: Fun

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #6

Oh yes, I am getting better at reliably providing you with your weekly fill-in-the-blank fun. I know you like it. Admit it. You get so excited, it makes me feel bad to deny you the joy. I'm barely getting it in on time, but hey, most of you do this thing on Mondays anyway, right?

So here's the drill for the newbies. After you read mine, copy and paste these into your comment, and replace my answer with yours. Simple, no? BUT WAIT. The trick is to get your UberIntelligent and/or UberWitty and/or UberBoring answer conveyed in just ONE WORD. I know, this is a lot to ask when you're dealing with important things in the world swirling all around you. But I have no doubt that you can accomplish the task. Are you ready?

Your Mood: Upward
What You're Craving: Cheese
Your Favorite Day of the Week: Saturday
Your Mind: Wandering
Something that Cheers You Up: Coffee
Something that Depresses You: Jeans
Where Your Keys Rest at Night: Counter
A TV Gameshow You Secretly Get Into: Feud
The Way You Like Your Eggs: Dippy
Your Hair: Wet
The Last Thing You Ordered Online: Books
The Messiest Room In Your Home Right Now: Guest
Your Least Favorite Month: January
The Worst Fashion Fad You Participated In: Pegging
How Many Times In the Night You Get Up To Pee (on average): Zero
Your Journey: Forking
A Sound that Makes You Happy: Chiming
Your First Date: Group
Something You Wish You Did More Often: Read
Something You Admire: Awareness
The First Place You Go When You Get Home: Puppies
What You're Going to Do Now: Bed

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #5

I know, I know. Sometimes it's hard to get your fabulous answer to make sense in only one word. DO IT ANYWAY. You get one word to answer each of these. Copy and paste mine into your comment and replace my answers with yours. I'll be watching yoooouuu...
p.s. - That shirt really brings out your eyes. Rawr.

Your Current Footwear: Socks
Something You're Doing Later: Regan
Something You Wish You Could Do Right Now: Buy
Your Age At the Time Of Your First Kiss: 14
Your Feelings About Global Warming: Nervous
A Sport You Wish Would Never Be Shown On Television: Bowling
Something On Your Desk that Shouldn't Be: Ziploc
A Word To Describe The Current State of Your Sex Life: meh
How the Sky Looks Right Now: Clouding
Which of Snow White's 7 Dwarfs You'd Be: Sneezy
Your Preferred Birthday Cake: Cupcake
A Magazine You Subscribe To: Blueprint
Number of Piercings You Have: 4
Your Favorite Delivery/Takeout Item: Fajitas
A Game You Hate to Play: Monopoly
The Name of Your First Real-Life Crush: Matt
The Hand You Write With: Left
The Hand You Wear Watches On: Left
Your Clothes Closet: Trashed
The Side of the Bed You Sleep On (from the on-the-bed perspective): Right
A Flavor You Love: SPICY!
Your Car: Jetta
The Last Thing You Misplaced: Phone
Your High School Mascot: Bulldog
Your Wasted Talent: Music

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #4

NO CHEATING! After you read mine, copy and paste these into your comment and replace my answers with your ONE-WORD responses. Your hair looks great today, by the way.

Feeling: Hungry
Thinking About: Salsa
Your Family History: Boring
The Last Person You Had "Words" With: Ricky
Want To Fly Away To: Italy
Hate the Sight Of: Vomit
The Sport Whose Players Turn You On: Soccer
Favorite Color Ink: Blue
American Idol Judge Who Irritates You Most: Randy
Place You Thought Monsters Hid When You Were Little: Closet
Favorite Spice or Herb: Basil
What You Like for Breakfast: Oatmeal
Your Living Room Couch: Smooshy
Most Recent Purchase: Headbands
Hours You Typically Sleep On Weeknights: Six
Something You Dislike: Guns
A Favorite Color: Ruby
Your Snack When Willpower Is Nonexistent: Salty
Your Bedsheets: Olive
The Part of Your Face You Scrunch Most Often: Brows
The Last Thing You Thought Was Funny: Jennifer
What You're Going To Do Now: Eat!

One-Word Sarcomical Sunday #3

You know the drill. After you read my answers, copy and paste this into your comment and change my answers with yours. Remember, ONE-WORD RESPONSES ONLY - don't get caught cheating, you cheaterlicious cheaterson.

This Moment: disappointed
Your Shoes: fuzzy
Craving: entertainment
The State of Your Home: better
Annoyed By: dogs
Noise In the Background: dryer
Really Want To: laugh
Thinking About: dinner
Your Keyboard: black
Smelling: balm
Favorite Product In Office Supply Aisle: pens
Don't Ever Want To: orbit
Your Eye Color: green
The Weather: wet
Have Never Tried: pot
Think Everyone Should Try: parasailing
Last Vacation Destination: NYC
The Last Thing You Had to Drink: water
Your Bad Habit: cuticles
What You're Going To Do Now: pee