Sarcomical

Half-Week Haiku 44: Caption-Masters' Challenge

So this was on the grounds of the local Art Center... Can you rise to the challenge and caption the ever-loving crap out of this...thing? In haiku form, of course. As always, I'll get it started: of all things to sculpt huge representation of husband's navel lint

Some Things Friday #50: Bananas, Honker, & Pie

Some Things I Love:

1. The smell of the air right before it rains.
   
2. People who can incorporate a Shooter McGavin reference effortlessly into a conversation.
   
3. Cupcakes
   
4. That my 3 1/2-year old niece, when I told her I have a garden this summer (and per her request was telling her what was in it), asked me "Hey, and are you growin' bananas?"
   
5. My Just-Turned 31 Husband. Happy Birthday, Baby! And OMG, how cute are you with that Mork from Ork doll at age 5? Aww...
   

Some Things I Hate:

1. Creepy animation like Corpse Bride and The Nightmare Before Christmas.
   
2. When women match their eyeshadow with their shirts.
   
3. Going to bed and realizing how THIRSTY I am but being too tired and lazy to get up and haul my ass downstairs to refill my glass, so I lay there tortured and conflicted...oh just thinking about it makes me feel like I'm in the desert.
   
4. Fuzzy spiders that LOOK AT YOU. Ohmigod, I'm going to scream.
   
5. Ashlee Simpson and her stupid new nose.
   

Some Things I Just Don't Get:

1. There's a squirrel behind our house with a hairless tail. Honest to God. Other than that, it looks like a regular squirrel. My husband thinks it's some Freak Rat/Squirrel Cross Mutant. Did it have a bushy tail at one time and get it caught in something? Do young squirrels not have furry tails? Is it a Terrorist-Bred Weapon that's going to slither into our garage one day with its Rat Tail and then sneak into our house under our feet when we aren't looking and strangle us with its Unholy Appendage while we're sleeping?!?
   
2. Why do the people in vaccuum cleaner commercials have SO MUCH CRAP on their floors? Um, an entire pot of dirt? Twigs and leaves? Half a box of cereal??? Piles of paper confetti?!!? What is going on in these houses? *sigh* My house is boring.
   
3. The appeal of owning a snake. Umm...ACK. *shudder*
   
4. How do people our age with no kids meet new friends? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
   
5. Is there ANYONE in the world who doesn't like pie and ice cream? I can't imagine such a thing. That would be so sad.